FREE MASTERCLASS

Why introverts make good conversationalists

May 19, 2020
 

Are you hiding behind being an introvert as an excuse for not joining in a conversation in French? I did, for about 25 years! Don’t let that be you! 

I want to share with you

  • Why introverts should stop seeing being an introvert as something to ‘get over’.
  • Why introverts can make the BEST conversationalists 
  • And how everyone can make the most of being part of a conversation

I want you to join in the French conversations once and for all. 

Picture this. You walk into the baker’s shop in France to practise your French only to be answered back in English.  All that prior preparation dissolved away in one tiny moment. 

I can almost feel your shoulders dropping with the disappointing memory!       

Or you start to join in a conversation in French but then when the others talk back to you, you freeze! And it’s all over because by the time you’ve thought out your answer, they’re already talking about something else.

I get that! It’s SO frustrating!

And it happens to everyone, introverts and extroverts alike.  

But as an introvert, you FEEL it more too! 

It’s devastating.  

As introverts, we are happy in our inner world and we tell ourselves stories that nobody else hears.  Which is why those stories go unchecked!

Stories like: “I’m rubbish at French!” or “They speak too fast for me!” . We internalise this. And it feels like we don’t have the ‘language gene’. 

After that, everything reinforces those negative feelings and it makes us nervous when we want to speak French. You know that sweaty palms, heart racing brain freeze type of nervous!

So here’s the first important point I have for you today:

#1. Introverts are often great speakers

Think of Ghandi and Winston Churchill, for example. Did you know they were introverts? How did they get over it? 

They didn’t! 

An introvert will always be an introvert.  Like me.  But everyone sees me as an extrovert. This is much like many teachers, in fact.

What do we do that helps us speak out?

One simple thing: 

Our intention. Introverts will speak out well when they know that they have something important to say. 

They will focus on the message and deliver it, however messy.  And this comes more easily when they are prepared.  

But I don’t mean that kind of memorised textbook phrase sort of preparation. I mean being prepared for the unexpected sort of phrase! 

Like “Franchement, je n’ai pas compris là” and “Répétez doucement, s’il vous plaît”

You see, as introverts, we spend a lot of time with our own inner thoughts. 

And that brings me to my second point:

#2. Introverts prepare

A good thing about introverts is that we spend time preparing ourselves for our speaking activity: We will set up a time and be there to talk with our French speaking partner or teacher. We will have our materials at hand and take care to be ready.  

In this preparation phase, the patience, the repetition and the systematic approach allows for further creativity in the conversation. And that prepares you for more spontaneous conversations when you go on holiday. 

Why? Because your ‘intention’ is that you are staying IN the conversation and learning from it by listening carefully to the answers you receive.  Introverts are phenomenal listeners, too! 

During the conversation, an introvert remains focussed on the person they are talking to. This is an important part of learning within the conversation. 

You get to gain valuable non-verbal clues whilst you are talking and so can make subtle changes to what you want to say, asking for words that will support what you want to say next. 

Also, precisely because you’re happy working alone, you will spend time internalising your French and practising your vocabulary.  Your French comes more easily to you because you are prepared. 

Now this part applies to introverts and extroverts alike:

I ask you - are you learning the right vocabulary - are you learning how Jean-Pierre got to the railway station today or are you fine-tuning those phrases that are going to keep you in French conversation, and develop your language skills as you converse? 

Because the latter are the ones that matter.  

You can now spend less time learning and thinking things through by using the simple language that gets you through spontaneous conversations. And you can focus on using it in real conversations with people. 

Because that’s where the learning comes to life. 

But if you leave it all to the last minute and rely on your people skills, you’ll always be stuck in what I call ‘Tourist mode’ and stumble to spontaneously adapt your phrases about how Jean-Pierre got on at the station that day!

Hmm, is that the conversation you really want?

And that brings me full circle.

If you’re an introvert and want to learn French from being in a conversation, you will feel far more comfortable relying on the tools you practise regularly that keep you IN the conversation. 

As an introvert, you’re far more likely to stay in the conversation if you’re comfortable with being in spontaneous conversations.

And as an introvert, focussing on the outcome rather than the fear of judgement and past experiences, means you’re going to enjoy your French conversations far more. 

And if you enjoy it, you’ll learn faster! 

So you have to prepare for spontaneous conversations.

People are enriching their French regularly in our weekly conversation meetings where they grow and learn from within the conversation. I provide the tools you need. 

They have taken their nose out of the textbook and got comfortable talking naturally together in French. 

They are ready to talk, whatever the situation because they are used to it! And introverts tend to hold back until they are used to things!

They used to be worried about speaking in French.  Now they’re excited to join in! 

Let’s recap:

1. If you’re an introvert you’re no less able than anyone else at having meaningful conversations in French.  So stop hiding! 

2. Introverts think things through really well and that includes preparing the right tools for staying in conversations and learning from them.

And the right tools are those that ensure you are clarifying your understanding and are rehearsed at speaking spontaneously. 

If you would like the opportunity to practise with us just send me a message at [email protected] Tell me you saw this blog post and we can book some time to see if it’s right for you. 

Don’t forget to LIKE, SUBSCRIBE and SHARE this video.  You never know who is sitting at home wondering if this opportunity will ever present itself!

So ask yourself are you an introvert who would like to speak French. Did this blog post give you the courage to speak French? Post a comment. 

Free Masterclass

Learn my 4 step method of how to hold meaningful french conversations the R.E.A.L. way in just 30 minutes a day.

When you signup, we'll be sending you weekly emails with additional free content